Just a Little Giggle..

..well, it strikes me as funny...

Strange it took me a week to realize it, considering I drive past it twice everyday during my commute time...

Does anyone else think it amusing that Pleasure Ride Auto is right beside the Silver Bullet?

YaaaaY!

When it comes to staying in contact with my family, I leave much to be desired. It is not that I do not have a deep love for or a strong sense of family. On the contrary ~ the fact that we are not in close contact is a source of sadness in my life. I guess I have basically given up. Long emails I write get two sentence replies if I'm lucky. With one member of my family, I can make every kind of effort available but it makes no difference.

The purpose behind this entry is not to garner sympathy, pity or compassion. The motive is this: my sister called me today. Sure, sometimes we allow long periods of time to go by without contact, but it isn't that we are second guessing each other, or afraid of reactions to an email or a comment. We just get busy. After a long conversation I felt reattached to at least that part of my family.

And we made a deal: Everytime we think about calling or emailing and don't do it, we have to put a quarter in a jar. We figure at our rate, it will be no time at all before we have enough money to purchase a plane ticket!

I love my sister.

It is All Ben's Fault!

He MADE me take this test!

Advanced Global Personality Test Results Extraversion |||||||||||||||| 63% Stability |||||||||| 36% Orderliness |||||||||||||||| 63% Accommodation |||||||||||||||| 63% Interdependence |||||||||||| 50% Intellectual |||||||||||| 50% Mystical |||||||||||||||| 70% Artistic |||||||||||||||| 63% Religious |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Hedonism |||||||||||| 43% Materialism |||||||||||| 50% Narcissism |||||||||||||| 56% Adventurousness |||||||||||| 50% Work ethic |||||||||||||| 56% Self absorbed |||||||||| 36% Conflict seeking |||||||||||||||| 63% Need to dominate |||||||||||| 50% Romantic |||||||||||||||| 70% Avoidant |||| 16% Anti-authority |||||||||||| 50% Wealth || 10% Dependency |||||||||| 36% Change averse |||||| 30% Cautiousness |||||||||||| 43% Individuality |||||||||||| 43% Sexuality |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Peter pan complex |||||||||| 36% Physical security |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Physical Fitness |||||||||||| 44% Histrionic |||||| 30% Paranoia |||||||||||||| 56% Vanity |||||||||||| 50% Hypersensitivity |||||||||| 36% Female cliche |||||||||||||||||||| 83%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

The trait snapshot is intriguing. It is very contradictory, which describes me almost perfectly!

self revealing, neat, craves attention, prefers organized to unpredictable, needs things to be extremely clean, worrying, perfectionist, emotionally sensitive, respects authority, social, vain, does not like to be alone, likes large parties, controlling, social chameleon, not a thrill seeker, enjoys leadership, takes precautions, puts the needs of others ahead of their own, assertive, rule conscious, makes friends easily, always busy, heart over mind, phobic, aggressive, clingy, compassionate, dominant, outgoing, suspicious, hard working, strong

Happiness Is...

...being at your new workplace.

What can I say? My first week was overwhelming and at times a little scary. Every day discoveries were made. Things I will have to learn and master within the next 3 weeks. The interesting thing is the pace. (Easy) The atmosphere. (Light-hearted) The genuine liking everyone seems to have for everyone else. In fact, one person I met yesterday said that very thing: "You will be happy here. We like each other!"

A multitude of faces and names have crossed the threshold of my office. Recalling them all is a challenge I am not yet ready to face. But they all smiled. They all welcomed me. I think this move is going to work out just fine. Already I've figured out one thing God can teach me here - to be more laid back, less intense. That won't be an easy lesson, but I am willing to learn!

Blessings.

Wow...

It was quite a day.

Now I Remember!

I do! I remember one of the reasons I stayed away from MySpace!

And So it Ends...

I have just begun my last day at my current workplace.
Someone told me I should toss some water on the
Wicked Witch of the West as I am walking out the door.
That sounded like a great idea last week.
Today, I am singing a different tune.

** later **

I think about the ones I love who are still here...
and know that God has a plan for them, too.
He is the Master Conductor of His worldwide orchestra
and somehow the tune always turns out sounding beautifully.
Like Mozart's complicated compositions,
I cannot begin to comprehend,
but I can listen and enjoy the music He creates.

True Love Demonstrated

You know it is true love when your reserved and highly introverted husband will not only take you to Kinston Indian Ball Games, but will also sing "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" during the seventh inning stretch.

You know it is an everlasting true love when the same husband will, also during the seventh inning stretch, do the Chicken Dance with you. :o)

The Building was Nearly Full...

...why did it seem so empty?

During praise & worship yesterday morning I became aware of what a lot of people in the congregation were feeling. There were a lot of heavy hearts. Some felt shell-shocked. Others were just plain tired.

The sad thing was as I was hearing God say, "Fear not, little flock," I saw the people standing around waiting for something to happen. Why? For two weeks now I have had the impression that God really desires for us to reach. stretch just a little. grasp. and step in. We don't have to wait for something to happen. The "something" is within us! If we would reach, step in, etc, the something we want to have happen would start within. Then we would see it manifest without.

The fatigue & downcast feelings would fall off if we could realize He is already in our midst, and inside of us. He is willing and able to meet our every need. Dare I say above what we can ask or think.

Later, during the sermon, Pastor John mentioned this same Power that has been deposited into our lives that remains untapped. This Power (the Holy Spirit) gives us the 'edge.' If we do not tap in, it leaves us to our natural resources only. He said it was much like having a swimming pool in the backyard but never getting in it. We can't experience the refreshing He has for us - the power, the knowledge, and the ability to rise above our circumstances - if we never get in the water.

What a concept: Coming to church already full - having stepped into His living water so that it is flowing out of us when we gather together to worship. He is with us always. He wants to be more active in our lives. When we will let Him? Imagine what it would be like to walk into service with our hearts and lives full. Our church services would be full as well. From the first chord that is struck on the first song.

Just imagine it.

Journey

It was an interesting drive to say the least.
It was well guided and protected from start to finish.
It was but one leg on
An increasingly intriguing expedition through life.
And on this voyage I am not alone.
There are others who seem to be encountering the same:
Fascinating occurrences that make one pause
To consider the path upon which they tread.
And this is just the beginning....

Knock Three Times

Admitting Aslan is not the smartest feline in the fold is not a problem for me. He can push a door open. Even the heavy swinging one that separates the kitchen from the laundry room. (But only on the way out, not on the way in.) He is not, however, good with his hands. Therefore, he has not mastered the art of pulling a door open. And of course when a door is completely shut he is totally powerless to get in (or out).

Yesterday Andy and I were in our room with the door closed. I thought I heard 3 knocks on the door but was not certain so I ignored it. After a short pause it happened again. No mistaking it this time: someone was knocking on the door. Upon opening the door I saw Alsan sitting in the hall perpendicular to the door and gazing up at me with his big amber-colored eyes. "Did you knock on the door?" I inquired. This is no lie: he looked around - behind him and everything - and then looked back at me as if to say, "Do you see anyone else sitting here?" before striding into the room and jumping onto the bed.

Synonym for Surrender

You bore the stripes
That made me whole
And spilled the blood
That cleansed my soul
And all You ask is that
I give my life to You.

So I surrender me to You.
It's the only thing I can do.
For the love that proved itself so true.
I surrender me to You.

If you ever wonder how you can truly show someone that you love them and love them as unconditionally as is humanly possible, let me make a suggestion: Surrender to them. When it is vitally important, sacrifice yourself for them. In fact, surrender sometimes when it is not at all significant.

Everytime we sing that song at church I think about Christ's sacrifice. I guess that's a good thing ~ after all, that is the song's intention. The song drives home the fact that Christ's sacrifice was in the area of surrender.

Nevertheless not my will, but Your will be done.

Do you not know I must be about my Father's business?

But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also.

Surrender is not about being a doormat. It is about treating others the way you want to be treated. It is about loving your neighbor as yourself. And we really must get off this kick about how we do not love ourselves. How many selfish acts do we perform each day? Why do we perform them? Self-love. Wanting to be first. Wanting to be provided for and taking measures to ensure its happening.

When done with the proper motive and the purest possible heart, a fabulous synonym for surrender would be....

love.

Is Obedience Synonymous with Faith?

Skin cancer runs in my family. My mother continues to have lesions removed even though she has severely limited her exposure to the sun for the past 10 years or so. My brother is permanently disfigured due to letting a cancerous growth take over a large portion of his face. And I've had two removed. The removal of a third was imminent until something happened.

The growth popped up a few months ago. At the time I wasn't certain what it was. It was on the back of my right hand, snuggled nicely between two prominent veins just beyond my index finger. About a month ago the spot started to grow. Quickly. And it itched like mad. Cancer, without a doubt. By last Sunday, the growth was probably six times its original size. I got worried. Having another skin cancer removed just did not rank all that high on my list of thrills, ya know? Besides, I didn't know how difficult it would be to remove, given its location.

Last Sunday, July 2nd, while in the choir and singing for praise & worship, that stupid spot started itching. It was driving me crazy! Finally, I complained to God. (*gasp!* Go figure, complaining to God!) He said something that sort of shook me up.

"Speak to it."

*Looks around* Huh? What did You say?

"Speak to it. Tell it to dry up and go away."

Now, I don't know about anyone else, but I've always had a problem with this speak to it thing. I have always believed God heals. I've always known the possibility exists. "Speaking" it seemed to be carrying it a little too far. Or perhaps it was more of a "that works for others but not for me" type of thing. Now, don't go into that "God is no respecter of persons deal" - that really isn't what this post is about.

I got home from church and pointed at the stupid itchy growth with the other index finger and told it to dry up and go away. Every time I got out of the shower or felt it itch, I repeated the words, "Dry up. Go away." Sometimes I included the Name of Christ. But not always.

By Wednesday the 5th, the skin cancer had shrunk back down to smaller than it was when I first noticed it. An itch or two here and there - but nothing much.

This afternoon I looked at it. It looked really dry. It had the appearance of a scab, but was not dark in color. Using the thumbnail of my left hand, I applied a little pressure to it. And it just .. came off. No pain, no bleeding, nothing. It's just...gone.

When I heard God tell me to speak to the skin cancer, I did not really believe anything would happen. However, I spoke to it anyway. (Let's be honest: there are many other things to which I would rather speak!) I was obedient for once. And now it is gone.

And so I ask the question: Is obedience synonymous with faith?

New Seasons

"New Seasons" come through storms. First, the air is heavy and oppressive. There is a sense that something is on the horizon. Then, a restless breeze begins to blow. This breeze increases into a wind that shakes leaves and ruffles feathers.


When the rain comes people are usually relieved but the rain of a new season has a purpose. This rain washes away grime, even to the eroding of certain poorly laid foundations. The rain also saturates the good ground in order to nourish and protect because...

...the fire will fall. Whatever is not washed away through the cleansing water of the rain will be burned up in fire. It is a frighening and sometimes painful experience. But when the smoke clears, the New Season comes.


And so we wait it out, our nose to the grindstone.
We continue to work at it until the fire falls, signifying completion.

....and the breakthrough comes.

Silly Quizzes

I took this one. Funny how it turned out. Interesting pic, though!

You scored as Cultural Creative

Cultural Creatives are probably the newest group to enter this realm. You are a modern thinker who tends to shy away from organized religion but still feels as if there is something greater than ourselves. You are very spiritual, even if you are not religious. Life has a meaning outside of the rational.

To me, this was the most interesting statement:

Religions have lost their focus and should be returned to their founding principles.

On the Verge

Do you ever feel as though you are at a crucial moment in your life? That just beyond your grasp is a concept, a knowing, that hangs out in the misty edges of your mind waiting to materialize? That feeling has been with me for quite awhile. Still elusive, it is becoming somewhat frustrating to me.

I often laugh and mention to people that God keeps our lives intriguing in order to keep our interest. That there are always more questions than answers. I have a sneaking suspicion it will always be this way. But then, how does one obtain knowledge without pursuing it?

Perhaps our finite minds can't handle the answers so they are not provided. Clay, I believe, is much further along than I am in the area of questions. This is not surprising. My mind is much more finite than his! Strange things have been happening to my friends and acquaintances. All of their recent experiences are coming together in my mind to form this one dare I say "Scriptural" notion:

All you need is love.
All you need is love.
All you need is love, love.
Love is all you need.

My heart is full of the desire to give. At the same time, my mind is splitting wide open with the realization that to love and be loved means trust and total honesty. . .

I think it is time for breakfast. Birthday cake. Yeah. Birthday cake.

Twenty-two

Today is Pat's birthday.
Almost impossible to believe
He is 22.

It has been quite a ride.
But I wouldn't change a thing.
I love you, son.