The Three-Strand Cord

When my musings on this subject began, I was angry and cynical. Okay, so maybe I'm still cynical (one change at a time, people!) However, I am no longer angry. I can't really call it a fascination~it is just that the three-strand cord has come up several times during the course of my marriage.

The first occurrence came about fifteen years ago. Andy and I were new attendees at a particular church and at one Sunday night service the pastor spoke over us about how God had bound us together with the three-strand cord that it is not easily broken. While the pastor was speaking, he held our hands and started making a tying motion as if he were wrapping this cord around our wrists. I remember thinking I could almost see the cord, with one of the ends draping down my hand and off the ends of my fingertips.

I cannot remember the details behind the second time a Christ-follower in authority mentioned the same thing, but I do know it was someone other than our pastor and it did not happen at the same church. It struck me as odd - but then I know God has a tendency to repeat Himself when something is important to Him. We're sort of dense, so He has to say things more than once.

And so we come to the present. Rather, the recent past. After I moved into my own apartment I started to take a different route to work each day. This road took me past several churches, one of which has a billboard that gets changed with some frequency. Guess what the billboard declared for about 6 weeks? "Husband + Wife + God. The three-strand cord that is not easily broken." I have to be honest. My first response was a snotty, 'Yeah, right!' Then I started thinking, "Okay - from where does this Scripture come and what does it really say?"

Here it is, Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (NASB)

Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.

I read a lot of different translations and they all pretty much said the same thing, one of them adding that a third companion makes up the cord of three strands. In my red-eyed anger, I fumed that this Scripture is taken entirely out of context when it comes to marriage. This passage talks about not laboring through life alone. About having a companion. A friend. It says nothing about wives, husbands, unions, vows...nothing!

I went to Ben, who is a trusted friend with a keen understanding of the Scriptures but isn't stuck in the small Christian 'box'. He tends to join me in the world of cynicism so I thought I'd have an ally. Was I ever wrong! He was gentle in his disagreement, but I definitely did not receive concurrence from him. Ben said he could see where the (now blasted) three-strand cord would apply to marriage.

I dropped the subject and didn't speak with him about it again. However, the stewing continued.

Isn't it always a "fateful day" when a person comes to a realization? I had one. I wish I could remember where I was when the colorful thing took place in my head. (That statement, rather than the word 'vision', is much easier for some to take.) I saw a three strand cord. It was lovely! the cords were different colors - white, blue, and gold. Yes, we could go into the significance behind the colors but I do not think that's what God wanted me to notice.What stood out to me was the fact that one of the cords was raveling. It was unwrapping itself and fraying in the middle. The interesting thing was the fact that the other two strands were somehow managing to hold the third into place. I have no doubt if the strand had been just two cords it would have snapped in half. That's when I noticed the golden thread. It was slightly thicker than the white and the blue.

The vision was confusing to me because of my state of emotions, but when I told Andy about it (in a restaurant) the tears came. Our three strand cord had been gone through a raveling 10 years ago and managed to survive. The vision was interesting and heartbreaking, but it didn't change my mind. Not then. Not yet. That happened on October 9th.

What did happen was clearer thought processes. A person's spouse should be a companion. A friend. A spouse should be the person you trust the most and the one human to whom you are the closest. Therefore, the passage in Ecclesiastes most certainly does apply. And with God as the third strand in the cord, I can say through experience ~ the three-strand cord is most certainly not easily broken ... even when I wanted it to break.

That is what I learned. For someone who isn't married, I'd have to add the importance of marrying a person of like faith. (Wow! That's Scriptural!) I don't see how it can be possible for the cord to be as strong without it.